The Break is Back

If you have some time and some money to spare then buy the special issue of Newsbreak regarding the last mid-term elections. It looks a lot like Time because of the red background. Plus you'll mistake it for Newsweek until you notice the picture of Ralph Recto.

I miss Newsbreak. It's one of those things I look forward to every week and then every two weeks. Honestly, I miss the weekly, then bi-weekly last pages of the magazine. If you have no idea what's included in the last few pages of the magazine, then you are most probably a non-Newsbreak reader.

This magazine should be a required reading for students. It makes more sense than requiring students to watch the bio-flick of Manny Pacquiao. That's true. Some schools required their hapless to students to endure hours figuring out the facial similarities between Manny Pacquiao and Jericho Rosales.

There are a lot of what if scenarios that popped in my head while reading my copy.

1. What if Jose De Venecia did not push for the Constituent Assembly? It will give Prospero Pichay an early start to campaign and could have (gasp) won. Now it can be told...there's something good about Con-Ass. It keeps rotten vegetables busy.

2. What if the Third Force of the Wednesday Group pushed through? Will they win or will they lose? I do not know but Recto will still lose.

3. What if Kiko Pangilinan ran under the Genuine Opposition banner? Then PLAN Co REVOLT would have been PLAN KiCo REVOLT.

4. What if Jericho Petilla maintained his slot in the Team Unity slate? The results would still be the same except that he will garner less votes than Cesar Montano.

5. What if Gloria Macapagal Arroyo campaigned for Team Unity? Edgardo Angara and Joker Arroyo will fight for the 12th slot.

6. What if Cayetano votes went to Joselito? I think it was Johnny Carson who said that if life is fair, Elvis Presley would be alive and all the impersonators dead.

7. What if Madam Auring campaigned for Victor Wood? Will there be a massive nationwide panic attacks and severe vomiting?

8. What if the 10 million strong Marcos loyalists voted for Oliver Lozano? Imelda Marcos would have gone ballistic because the same 10 million strong Marcos loyalists did not vote for her in the 1992 presidential elections.

9. What if the resume of Felix Cantal is true? Then parallel universe exists.

Endless Belief in the Goodness of Humanity

Anger is the easiest emotion to express regarding the case of Musa Dimasidsing. He should have not been dead. Instead, he should have been put under a witness protection program in order for him to continue his fight against electoral fraud. But anger has its limits, indifference is one of them. Honestly, do people even care if he died? More so, do they even know that a certain Musa Dimasidsing, who according to one candidate refused to sign a document affirming that no electoral hoax occurred in Maguindanao, senselessly died?

Indifference is the black hole of national anger.

Days after a grueling campaign, I promised myself that I would take a deserving rest before the start of an even more grueling academic year. I watched all the DVDs that Edu Manzano and the rest of the Optical Media Board do not like. The highlight of which is a Hayao Miyazaki movie marathon. Miyazaki is considered a god by hardcore anime fans like me. Once described as Steven Spielberg and Orson Welles combined, the Japanese genius has been churning out spectacular but most importantly, intellectual anime masterpieces. Philippine elections are dirty and real. Miyazaki films are comforting and pure imagination. Most of his oeuvres are coming-of-age stories of young independent girls faced with a problem that they must overcome through unselfish desire and endless belief in the goodness of humanity.

Damn.

Can you even describe Philippine politics as the allocation of power through unselfish desire and endless belief in the goodness of humanity?

It is hard to desire without thinking of your personal gains. Thus, it is highly understandable that ‘unselfish desire’ is a concept that resides in the realm of the fiction. However, ‘endless belief in the goodness of humanity’ must never loose its appeal in the real world. It has another and much simpler name. It is called hope.

Before the campaign period began, our nation hoped for clean and peaceful elections that no part of the scandalous 2004 elections would be replicated. With more than a hundred election-related violence reported, the head of the Philippine National Police described it as ‘generally peaceful.’ With the occurrence of ancient electoral problems such as vote-buying, ballot box snatching, and the all-too familiar cheating taking place in all levels – the present administration was elated with a so-called ‘successful election.’ The rest of the Filipinos could only raise an eyebrow.

Yet Musa Dimasidsing raised more than an eyebrow. He raised his voice. Now he is dead. This is the price he paid for being a fine Filipino citizen. This is the price he paid for acting like a civilized person. This is the price he paid for re-establishing the goodness of humanity.

I personally hate this news. I never intended to write a blog entry on the Musa Dimasidsing case if not for the good intentions of The Voice of the Filipino. For two days, I felt good watching well-crafted anime and then the pointless killing of Musa Dimasidsing pierced my consciousness. It was quick and numbing. The reassurance that I experienced watching several Japanese animated films suddenly disappeared faster than the missing certificates of canvass in Maguindanao. The news shattered the rose-colored glasses that I was wearing for a couple of days like a vicious wrecking ball.
It’s back to reality.

The police was quick to warn the public not to relate the case with the Maguindanao electoral fraud in the senatorial race. They said that there is big chance that the death of Musa Dimasidsing is due to a heated local race.

It does not matter whether it was a consequence of a local struggle or a massive national deceit. For crying out loud, the life of a person was forcibly taken through bullets!

One day the perpetrators would be apprehended (or maybe not), but that is not enough. The number of dying and disappearing Filipinos is increasing in such an alarming rate. Had the authorities stamped their – what else – authority and prevented the crimes, then the killers of Musa Dimasidsing would have thought twice before executing him. The same thing with election fraud had the Hello Garci issue ended with a legal and logical closure then there would have been a lesser amount of mistrust in the atmosphere. Legal and logical closure means, the cheaters get punish.

But expecting punishment from a government filled with power-hungry individuals is the same as expecting the Team Unity senatorial slate to perform extremely well in the last elections.

I am pretty sure Musa Dimasidsing will end up as another nameless, faceless Filipino in our non-existent national consciousness. But neither in my case nor with the other bloggers who exerted effort and provided precious space in articulating their sentiments for him.

I still maintain my endless belief in the goodness of humanity.

I hope that I am not alone.

The 2007 Election Awards

It is unfair that election losers will not bring home consolation prices. Thus, I thrust upon myself to honor the 2007 candidates with several awards that will not necessitate the permission of the Commission on Elections.

The I-am-so-consistent-I-love (or hate)-myself Award
Champion: Loren Legarda
The consistent pre and post election survey first-placer (except for one Kiko moment) will end up in the official counting as the first placer.
Runner-up: Mike Defensor
He was really consistent in the 15th spot. He must hate that kind of consistency.

The Phenomenal Failure of Election 2007
Champion: Tito Sotto
He started out in the top ten and ended up in the twilight zone. I guess it’s back to noontime shows.
Runner-up: Chavit Singson
Joseph Estrada will shed tears of joy for the monumental defeat of his erstwhile friend and drinking buddy.

I-am-a-slap-in-the-face-of-Hermogenes Esperon Trophy
Recipient: Antonio Trillanes IV
Imagine Esperon facing a senate investigation spearheaded by the Magdalo leader.

Gold Medal for a Slow but Sure Campaign
Chiz Escudero
From14th place to 8th and 6th places then finally a surprising runner-up finish – and to think that he had minimal campaign materials – never ever underestimate the power of charisma.

Silver Medal for a Slow but Sure Campaign
Noynoy Aquino
The sixth spot is supposed to be occupied by Joker Arroyo but the only son of Cory Aquino bumped off the feisty dragon. Despite of the James-Hope controversy, Aquino managed to solidify his high ranking. I did my share. I was shouting ‘I love you Noynoy’ during the Genuine Opposition’s miting de avance. For the record, I was the only one who dared to commit such unthinkable act.

Bronze Medal for a Slow but Sure Campaign
Miguel Zubiri
He’s really within striking distance. If he wins, it’s a classic photo finish. If he looses, then it’s a case of I-did-my-best-but-I-guess-my-best-wasn’t-good-enough. His ‘Boom Tarat’ commercial fell flat but his last ads rectified the embarrassment. One thing though. His over made-up face in his campaign posters is really disturbing.

Alone but not Lonely Award
Champion: Kiko Pangilinan
As the Professional Heckler said, ‘who needs a party if you have Sharon Cuneta for a wife?’ But his decision to leave the opposition contributed to his fall from 1st to 5th place.
Runner-up: Gringo Honasan
It’s final. Harvey Keh will leave the Philippines.

Invisibility Award
Recipient: Sultan Jamalul Kiram
Lakas-CMD should be penalized for including unknown Muslims (who have no chance of winning) in their line-ups. You still remember Senatoriable Parouk Hussin? Just to accommodate the Muslim sector in ‘Christian Muslim Democrats,’ this party will pluck out unsuspecting personalities and haplessly throw them in the vicious arena of elections. They did try to lure Adel Tamano…but he had so much sense and turned the offer down.

I’m-stuck-in-my-father’s-shadow Award
Recipient: Koko Pimentel
I have a strong feeling that his high pre-election ranking is a case of mistaken identity. People thought that it was the elder Pimentel who is running.

I’m-stuck-in-my-husband’s-shadow Award
Recipient: Sonia Roco
She could have won. Next time: more commercials with less Raul appearances. Be your own, girl!

I’m-simply-stuck Award
Recipient: Nikki Coseteng
Stuck in the realm of defeat. It’s a good thing that she placed higher than Tessie Oreta or the outcome would have been mortifying. She should have given way to other candidates and helped the opposition camp in other ways.

UP Hates Me so Much Certificate
Recipient: John Osmena
E-mail brigade is lovelier the second time around. The next time you run, the Oblation will carry a Don’t Vote Osmena tarpaulin banner.

Nice-try-better-luck-next-time Award
Recipient: Ang Kapatiran (Zosimo Paredes, Martin Bautista, and Adrian Sison)
Their intentions are most appreciated but next time make sure that you’re individuality stands to avoid confusing your party-name as some party-list groups.

Eddie Gil Plaque of Appreciation
Recipient: Jose Pepito Cayetano
Probably, the only nuisance candidate who almost destroyed the winning chances of a sure winner.

Silver Medal for Nuisance
Recipient: Felix Cantal
Watch his stint in Isang Tanong and you’ll witness the reason for his runner-up ranking.

Bronze Medal for Nuisance
Recipients: Victor Wood and Oliver Lozano
The Jukebox King wants a grand comeback. He’ now experiences the grandeur of being a national laughingstock. Lozano knows how to make a scene. He dismissed the SWS and Pulse Asia surveys then came up with a print ad showing his third-place ranking in a ‘nationwide text survey.’ I guess the Marcos loyalists are better texters than voters.

Catchiest Campaign Advertisement
Recipient: Manny Villar
It did not reach Mar Roxas level but it sure hell was catchy. Once more, ‘Si Manny Villar na/Mister Sipag at Tiyaga.’ Major LSS.

Worst Campaign Advertisement
Recipient: Mike Defensor
I know that he already conceded. Sorry for piling it in but the ‘Tol series has eye-gouging tendencies.

Cutest Campaign Advertisement
Champion: Chiz Escudero
The ‘Kids’ a.k.a. ako rin commercial is probably the cutest commercial that really complements his Say Chiz tagline. Now it can be told: cute kids can upstage a cute a candidate.
Runner-up: Joker Arroyo
The ad featuring his cartoon alter-ego which is the cutest politician-inspired cartoon in the history of our republic gave him a runner-up position. Escudero also has a cartoon alter-ego but the elder Bicolano had a better-looking one.

The-campaign-advertisement-voice-over-sounds-so-like-her-rival Award
Recipient: Loren Legarda
Listen to the part where the voice over shouts ‘Loren Legarda. Number 1 sa Senado.’ Doesn’t it remind you of Noli De Castro?

Most Annoying Campaign Advertisement
Champion: Tessie Oreta
Without a doubt…her I am sorry moment ruined her chances.
Runner-up: Tessie Oreta
Wow! A 1 – 2 finish for the other Aquino. Which commercial? The battered wife episode also known as ‘Kung hindi kay Senator Tessie hindi ko malalaman na hindi pala dapat sinasaktan ang mga babae.’ Damn. To think that her elder sister is a well-respected movie director.

Cut and Paste Political Advertisement Citation
Recipient: Ping Lacson
His HOPE commercials do not include song and dance routines or dramatic sketches. It was just a compendium of video clips with an orchestral rendition of his Bill Clinton-inspired campaign song.

Catchiest Campaign Battle Cry
Recipient: Prospero Pichay
Hands down winner. How can you argue with ‘Pichay: Itanim sa Senado’ for a tagline? As Alyanna Martinez articulated, ‘This is not a serious answer because there really isn’t one particular politician that I like but I must say that Prospero Pichay’s ‘Itanim sa Senado’ tagline really did catch my attention. It’s just too funny but it works.’

Bench-worthy Campaign Poster
Recipient: Chiz Escudero
Bench as in the global retail brand. Brown shirt + jeans + trademark smile = screaming girls.

Give-me-charisma-or-give-me-defeat Award
Recipient: Edgardo Angara
It speaks a lot about your ability to connect with people that despite of your numerous legislative accomplishments – you still need a young singing superstar like Sarah Geronimo to up your winning ante.

Gift Checks for Free Make-Over
Recipient: Vic Magsaysay
The Ramon Magsaysay-inspired wardrobe is not effective because he doesn’t have the vibe of the Guy. If he wants to look and sound like the legendary president then do something about his
face. Forsake the mobster look…it’s scaring the voters. It’s even cheaper if he does not include his pictures in his campaign posters.

Gift Checks for Free Make-Under
Recipient: Miguel Zubiri
You read it right, a make-under. His face in his campaign posters was over made-up. The amount of foundation used by the outgoing Bukidnon representative is at most, disturbing. How can he expect people to stop questioning his…that he is…uhmm…something that rhymes with ‘say.’

The Campaign Poster Crystal Cup
Recipient: Prospero Pichay
For practically blanketing the entire Philippines with his campaign materials, the outgoing Surigao Del Sur representative shall receive the prestigious cup donated by the Philippine Printing Press Association. The country has never seen a marketing ploy as excessive as that of Pichay which could only be described as gargantuan. He still lost.

Campaign Fund Philanthropy Citation
Recipient: Jamby Madrigal
Her initiative to fund the television ads of incarcerated candidate Antonio Trillanes boosted his level of awareness. In addition, the senator-heiress has successfully acquired the eternal ire of Hermogenes Esperon and Raul Gonzales.

The Grand Terpsichorean Trophy
Recipient: Manny Villar
Dancing should have been exploited by Tessie Oreta instead the electorate witnessed the current senate president showing off his skills. Imagine what he would do when he run for president in 2010.

Use-me-I’m –popular-I-could-definitely-bring-in-the-crowd Award
Recipient: Cesar Montano
What was he thinking?

Most Important Contribution of EVAT Award
Recipient: Ralph Recto
More precisely...the defeat of Ralph Recto.

Newest Political Heartthrob
Recipient: Adel Tamano
Some Team Chiz members will be branching out to form Team Adel 2010. The spokesperson position in the opposition camp is turning out to be a charm for aspiring senatoriables. In 2004, it was Chiz Escudero. Position: opposition spokesperson. Wanted: young, articulate, handsome, and well-educated lawyer with senatorial aspirations.

Ignacio Bunye Awardee for Skillful Spokesmanship
Recipient: Tonypet Albano
William Esposo concluded that he is the best endorser of GO’s secret weapon Adel Tamano. This guy is a multi-tasker. He can make you laugh and irritate you at the same time.

Virgilio Garcillano Memorial Trophy
Recipient: Lintang Bedol
Commissioners Benjamin Abalos and Rene Sarmiento could have won the prize but how can you resist giving it to Bedol. The stolen certificates of canvass, the sudden disappearance, and the stench of massive electoral fraud…ah…Garciliano would have been proud.

Political Endorser of the Year
Champion: Susan Roces
For having commonsense of NOT endorsing the complete Genuine Opposition (only one as a matter of fact) and for not saying ‘Vote Chiz Escudero: not once but twice’ as her campaign line – she gets my nod as political endorser of the year. Alright, I just made up the second reason but I have wanted to say that line for a long time. Vote Chiz Escudero: not once but twice.
Runner-up: Mother Lily Monteverde
She had a pretty good endorsement average. I think only Ralph Recto lost while Miguel Zubiri is still within striking distance. Loren Legarda. Chiz Escudero. Manny Villar. Kiko Pangilinan. Noynoy Aquino. Antonio Trillanes. Hey. That was impressive. It’s just that Ms Roces is now considered a political figure.

The Eternal Love Grand Prize
Recipient: Sunshine Cruz
Remember when she emotionally vowed to pawn her wedding ring just to help the campaign activities of his husband? All that was missing is a stirring musical score with a sunset background and we have a modern Scarlett O’Hara promising with God as her witness. Cesar Montano lost and the ring is safely tucked in her finger.

Matrimonial Madness Medal of Honor
Champion: Tito Sotto and Helen Gamboa
If a gossip merited a Ricky Lo article and front page article in the Philippine Daily Inquirer (PDI), then it should be given any award. ‘Helen Gamboa left his husband because she discovered his extra-marital affairs!’ ‘Tito Sotto is having an affair with Zsa Zsa Padilla!’ ‘Tito Sotto is having an affair with Tessie Oreta!’ And the headlines get gross day after day.
Runner-up: Edgardo and Gloria Angara
Since this only merited a front page space of the PDI, it’ll only place as runner-up. But in terms of the juice (as in juicy stuff), this is first place contender. Did the Seer of Sea and Sierra have an affair with Loren Legarda?

The Pulse is Getting Loud

It would only be a matter of time before the tandem of Ben Evardone and Tonypet Albano calls Pulse Asia as False Asia.

The latest results will not sit well with the Team Unity campaign managers. Loren Legarda is pulling away. Much as I want my candidate to rank first, I must admit that it would be hard to dislodge Legarda from top spot. Unless she makes some major stupidity in the homestretech or the Man from Bukidnon weaves his magic again, Pashmina will once again flow in the Senate halls.

Manny Villar and Francis Escudero continue to fortify their positions in the Circle of Five. The good news is that a supposedly independent but highly-wife dependent candidate is slipping. Sometimes I can't help but believe the rumors that he commissioned another survey in which he ranked first.

Ping Lacson rounds up the top five. He is still true to his words that he will not use any celebrity in his campaign.

The next two spots are cornered by Team Unity candidates Ralph Recto and Edgardo Angara. These two candidates know how to harness the power of media and I am not talking of the Star for all Seasons kind. Angara and Recto have the most choiciest ad spots in television as well as radio.

They are followed by Benigno Aquino III and Alan Peter Cayetano. Kris Aquino can do wonders for his big brother despite her on-going real life melodrama. On the other hand, Pia's younger brother is being affected by so-called spoiled ballots due to the other Cayetano. Somebody really hates this guy.

The last three contenders in the Magic 12 are Joker Arroyo, Tito Sotto, and Gringo Honasan. Remember Harvey Keh? Well...if he really loves the Philippines, he should start praying that the last two in the list drops further down the loser's drain. Honasan...it's amazing. He's behind bars but he still ranks way above Prospero Pichay. Despite a barage of People's Dragon ads, Arroyo can only manage a tenth spot. In the case of Tito Sotto, it will be just a matter of time...before we say goodbye.

Here's something interesting. The survey was conducted during the height of the Ducat hostage drama. So where is Chavit Singson? Down there with Mel Chaves and Joselito Pepito Cayetano.

The pulse is getting loud...majority of the Filipinos hate the current administration.

Buts, Rebuts, and Scuttlebutts

The Buts
Slanted Surveys
The last line in the editorial of the Philippine Daily Inquirer yesterday summed up my feelings regarding the concerted effort of the administration to downplay the election surveys conducted by different firms. ‘Claudio is desperate.’

One of the courses that I took as a Sociology student in UPLB is Statistics 166 or Statistics for Social Sciences. In this course, students are taught different scientific methodologies in conducting research – one of which is surveys. There are a number of criticisms thrown against this method including its simplistic and mechanic approach to human behavior and opinion. Despite of the various academic vilifications, it remains one of the most popular traditional methodologies due to its numerical and scientific character. Personally, I prefer the alternative approaches to research such as narrative analysis but it is more convincing to explain a social phenomenon using statistics. I mean it is really hard to argue with numbers.

The desperation of Arroyo and her media hired guns to kill the credibility of the two leading survey firms borders Jun Ducat territory. It is too desperate and too stupid. The best counter-argument to Ben Evardone and Tonypet Albano is that this is the same administration that swore to the same survey firms in order to justify the election victory of the present Palace occupant. In the process, the administration itself is undermining the very same rationale that they rammed down to our doubtful throats during the wild days of the Garci controversy.

But I guess the administration is too desperate to think rationally.

The Impossible Dream
Clean sweep. 12-0. The more popular Genuine Opposition is not even considering an election sweep yet its survey bottom-dweller counterparts are quite confident of doing the improbable. Team Unity could only achieve this lofty goal through unprecedented electoral manipulation.

But it is a been-there-done-that situation for the administration. If this happens then the impossible could become possible – People Power.

In the Name of Her Father
The daughter of Mike Defensor campaigned yesterday for her father in a TU sortie in Bataan. The young Defensor noted that her father is working harder to finally barge in the winning circle. Despite getting stuck in 15th place in two previous surveys, she said that Tol could still win since surveys are usually unreliable. Using Mar Roxas as an example, she recalled that the election topnotch climbed from 33rd to first place.

But he is Mar Roxas and your father is a Mike Defensor. In all honesty, I am not a big fan of possible presidential candidate, but it is rather unfair to compare the campaign strategies of the two politicians. First Mr Palengke has a catchy and decent television advertisement. The same could not be said to Defensor. Second – the Korina Sanchez factor. I still believe that that she was the real factor.

The Tale of the Talent
Finally…television ads of Cesar Montano. The verdict? What the F! His campaign line is using your talent wisely for the benefit of our country. If there is one battle cry that could hurt the chances of candidate – then this must be it. Cesar…Cesar you are one of the most talented actors in the business today. But your talent is acting not legislating. If you really want to promote the wise use of talents, then stick to acting.

Hand in the Cookie Jar
Prospero Pichay broke the COMELEC directive of campaign ceasefire during the Lenten period. The Surigao representative argued that he was merely asking the people to plant Pichay in the senate.

But…oh goodness…is this the kind of lawmaker that our country deserves?

Rebut
The Mike Defensor Defender
One regular Votester visitor (honeypie)has recently accused me of being Chiz Escudero's Demolition Woman. I do love the sound of it...Demolition Woman. It kind of makes me a female Terminator.

Here are some of her rants which was posted on May 19:
Yan si hello_garci at purple pheonix ay isang tao lang!! mga demolition job ni chiz!! paano ko nalaman?? aba e magaling yata ang TEAM MIKE!! we have the machinery and means, by may Mike will get the number one spot and chiz will drop to number 13! because he is nothing but foolishness. look at his photo and judge his looks!

First, I am the Purple Phoenix. I do not have a second Votester account under the name Hello_Garci nor do I have any other Votester account. I even requested other Team Chiz members to refrain from voting more than once (using different accounts) since it is akin to cheating. Real winners don't cheat they just win.

Second, Mike Defensor has been stuck in the 15th spot in the last two SWS surveys while Chiz Escudero continues to barge in the top five. If Mike gets first place...oooh...I have to tell you it will be an eyebrow-raising moment. Remember that Mike's boss (The Fake One) kept on swearing by the survey firms to justify her win in the last elections. Let me see her swear on it again.

Lastly, Team Mike? Never heard. Machinery and means to manipulate the elections - yes - I believe your team does have one.

The Scuttlebutt
In one Internet forum, a thread topic discussed the rumor that each Team Unity candidate will be assured of 9 million votes. Woah!

Senator Jamalul Kiram, anyone?

PLANT A LOVER

Sooner or later they will come up with an acronym. I have been thinking one for the Genuine Opposition because there is no way in hell will I think for the other coalition. I was able to produce quite a number of combination including...

PLANT A LOVER. Officially that is the preferred mnemonic device for the Genuine Opposition.

P Pimental
L Legarda
A Aquino
N Nikki
T Trillanes

A Allan

L Lacson
O Osmena
V Villar
E Escudero
R Roco

Adel Tamano warned of 'malicious minds' reversing letters so that it would read as PLAN A REVOLT.

If it is a revolt against the persisting evil perpetuated by this administration then I am all for a REVOLT.

More Political Twaddle

Gone Too Soon
Finally. The Commissioned Elections er Commission on Elections has decided to disqualify Jose Pepito Cayetano infamously known as the 'other Peter.' But Oliver Lozano's favorite candidate can still appeal his case. The highly-independent Abalos-led COMELEC found out that Pepito cannot run a national campaign. Wow. It took them this long.

Providential Annoyance
The progeny of Lito Atienza has filed his certificate of candidacy yesterday. For some reason the father-son tandem that vowed to bring Manila back to its former glory wore matching Hawaiian polo shirts. The incumbent mayor expressed surprise over the incident since it was just a pure coincidence. Or as he exactly put it 'providential coincidence.' Keeping a serious mien while mouthing off incredibly stupid statements to explain political gimmickry is a skill every politicians must have.

China Crisis
Look out Tarlac. As if the fraternal battle of Lakas and Kampi is not enough, the kid bully (Kampi) will field Patricia Jose Cojuangco more popularly known as China against the wife of Representative Gilbert Teodoro. She's the sister of sports heroine Mikee Cojuangco. If you were able to follow China's career then you know that this latest development is an epic disaster in the making. She infamously co-hosted the Binibining Pilipinas pageant several years ago. It was such a terrible stint that prompted a critic to make stinging comments. He said that if he was only young, beautiful and rich he would have done a better job than China because he has more personality. Unfortunately, I was able to watch her works as an actress...let's just say that it was bad. Now she wants to be a lawmaker? In the article of the Philippine Daily Inquirer, it was quoted that China will 'continue the selfless service of the Cojuangcos to their home province.' Marvelous. Except that she has to reactivate her voter's registration because she did not vote twice in the last elections. Can you honestly talk about service when you do not even vote?

The Attack of Campaign Ads

Several weeks from now the unsinkable Filipinos will be casting their votes. But if most of the national candidates still have cash to spend...then we all have to suffer from the a barrage of campaign ads.

Since I have no time to watch television due to Hell Week, I had to contend myself with You Tube.

Here are the slew of commercials that were uploaded.

Enjoy. Or suffer.

Team Unity
Martin? Are you reading this post? Don't worry I won't say that Prospero Pichay is arrogant. Maybe in another blog post. But you have to hand it to his pork barrel er personal wealth. The guy has a music video

Taking a cue from his wife, Ralph Recto's ad is filled with rejected dancers from the show Vilma in Person.

If there's a rough and gruff award given out to candidates, Vic Magsaysay would win hands down. Here's why. I said rough and gruff. I did not say smuggler. Who said that?

Kapag bad ka! Lagot ka! Make way for the oldest dragon - I mean - people's dragon. I can't find a link to his ad though.

You know that you have a really big image problem if an icon gets the lion share of your political ad.

It must be gut feeling but the first time I saw this ad I felt that it was some cheesy campaign propaganda. I was right on the money. But I never thought that it was that lame. Sotto. Tito ko sa Senado. What the hell is that?

Nobody uploaded the ad of Tessie Oreta. Sad.

No ad yet for Cesar Montano. There must be a grain of truth to fund favoritism within Team Unity.

There's a new Zubiri commercial but it was the expensive Boom Tarat that had people abuzz. Was it really that expensive? But it is not helping him. If a media-barred Trillanes is more popular than you then you better think twice. Plus...idol ng Kabataan? I have to warn you of the thousands of Team Chiz memebers.

The only video that responded to the query 'Jamalul Kiram' is the infamous Sultan-of-Brunei-blooper of Igorota - I mean Gloria.

He was one of the early predators of television with his Ang Gara ng Buhay ad. Now he asked the endorsement of singing superstar Sarah Geronimo to push his spiraling survey rankings to the top.

Genuine Opposition
Honestly, the ads of Chiz Escudero would appeal to the youth but not generally to the masses. I found the first (of a series) quite ironic. He goes by the tag Boses ng Senado yet he did not speak a single word. The second one is more appropriate - he talked about the importance of having dreams and aspiration. Tuparin kaya ni Pichay ang mga pangarap ni Chiz?

The Pateros-Taguig representative is quite lucky to have a director for a brother. The only candidate endorsed by the First Gentleman. Live-action interspersed with animation - quite new. But my beef with this one is the song - Francis Magalona? Come on. Plus what's with the boxing gloves?

She started her political journey with Loren Loren Sinta. The leader of the survey pack is making a comeback with this ad. Her white blouse though reminds me of her Ariel detergent powder commercials.

Lacson maintains that he would not use celebrities to endorse his candidacy. He has been consistent ever since despite having an actress for a daughter-in-law. I can't find a video of him though. Trivia: the campaign jingle was inspired by the campaign song of Bill Clinton - Don't Stop Thinking about Tomorrow. No uploaded video though.

There are some things Manny can't buy. Like terpsichorean ability. Villar could use some dancing lessons.

Nene Pimentel got Kris Aquino's endorsement during the last few days of the campaign. He surged ahead from the brink of defeat and from the claws of dagdag-bawas. This time the real life telenovela celebrity will do anything (with or without Hope) to make his brother win.

Tatak Osmena or Latak ng Osmena? You decide.

Sonia Roco explained that her ad was inspired the music video of Natalie Cole where she eerily sang with his dead father Nat. It's a decent ad but I remember that her husband had well-crafted commercials the last time he ran? Contact them again Mrs Roco. I'm not a big fan but I'd rather have you in the senate than Ralph Recto.

The other heartthrob of the Opposition (there are three including Adel Tamano) is sadly in jail. But his strong showing in surveys as well as the fact that he's jockeying positions against big spenders like Pichay and Zubiri shows that Trillanes has a chance. Yup. The guy has an ad and it stings like wild bee. Here's another one. Rebel with a cause that looks much better than James Dean!

I did not find any video of Koko Pimentel. But I saw it one time. Decent but you should start stepping out of your father's shadow.

Does Nikki Coseteng have a campaign ad? Honestly, I've not seen anything. Her posters are good quality though. Come to think of it she used less make-up than Miguel Zubiri in her posters.

How about the only independent but wife-dependent candidate Francis Pangilinan? In the spirit of fairness, here's his Mountain Dew inspired campaign ad.

The Cheating has Started

Try surfing Votester. It is a beta site that allows Yehey members to vote their preferred senatoriables and party-lists representatives.

Francis Escudero has been leading the tally for quite some time. He is followed by fellow oppositionists Antonio Trillanes IV and Panfilo Lacson. Yesterday (March 14), the 2bU section of the Philippine Daily Inquirer published an article regarding the website. It mentioned that although the votes of Chiz is not an indicator whether he would be the next Mr Palengke, it still show that the youth are indeed watching the election season.

I browsed Votester and to my surprise Mike Defensor placed second. It would not have come as a surprise except that he never figured in the Top 6. What is more shocking is that he suddenly reached the 100 vote mark. As one fellow Team Chiz member observed, Chiz received a normal 20-30 votes in one day while Mike gathered around 50-60 votes.

Since I am a big CSI fan, I decided to investigate. Based on the testimonials of Defensor in the site, most of his 'supporters' visited Votester from March 14 to 15. On the other hand his critics commented on March 3 or 4. See the discrepancy? In addition, noticed that the 2bU article was published on March 14.

I would not be surprised if Tol's 'supporters' voted in droves as a reaction to the article.

But this was not the first time. Remember ANC's Face-Off? For some unexplainable reason, despite the competence of Escudero the former presidential chief of staff kept on piling the text votes.

The cheating has definitely started.

But I guess most Filipinos know the truth. They know it very well that they are rewarding the Sorsogon lawmaker a high ranking in the surveys.

The Pulse

The newest Pulse Asia Survey shows that the Genuine Opposition candidates are still leading their administration counterparts. Conducted from February 28 - March 5, the results are as follows:

1st Loren Legarda
2nd Panfilo Lacson
3rd Francis Pangilinan
4th Francis Escudero
5th Ralph Recto
6th Manuel Villar
7th Joker Arroyo
8th Benigno Aquino III
9th Edgardo Angara
10th Allan Peter Cayetano
11th Gregorio Honasan
12th Vicente Sotto III

The survey shows that the following candidates still have statistical probability of entering the Magic 12:

1 Aquilino Pimentel III
2 Vicente Magsaysay
3 Sonia Roco
4 John Osmena
5 Michael Defensor

The other findings of the survey shows that:
1 Noynoy Aquino is the biggest gainer rising from 14th to 7th place in the last Pulse Asia Survey.

2 Tito Sotto is the biggest loser dropping 7 notches.

3 Due to the entry of Joselito Cayetano, Allan Peter placed 10th instead of 4th.


The other findings of the Purple Phoenix shows that:
1 The sample gathered by Pulse Asia are not fans of Sharon Cuneta.

2 Joselito Cayetano is either getting popular or some voters are too lazy to write the full name of the Taguig representative.

3 Hmmm...it seems that Noynoy benefited from the James-Hope controversy.

4 Not even a rebellion case or imprisonment could diminish the charisma of Honasan.

5 The sample gathered by Pulse Asia hates vegetables. Where the hell is Pichay?

6 The magic of Boy Abunda has not rubbed off his favorite candidate. Tol is still short of victory.

7 Miguel Zubiri should beg Wowowee to revert back to their original song Boom Tarat Tarat.

8 Rez Cortez should be having a gin pomelo party. The ASO jingle seems to be affecting the candidacy of a certain comedian.

9 Sarah Geronimo seems to be an effective endorser. I think more people would vote for Angara because of the young singing superstar than believe his tag line - Ang Gara ng Buhay.

10 Magsaysay ranked 14th. Wow.

11 This is a bias observation but Escudero is on a roll. Going up to the top! Team Chiz we still have a lot work to do. Complacency is not the answer.

Master of the Mock Elections

After topping the senate staff and SSS mock elections, Francis Escudero placed number 1 in the Ateneo de Davao mock polls.

Here is the complete article.

DAVAO CITY (MindaNews/12 March) – The Opposition’s Rep. Francis “Chiz” Escudero topped the March 9 automated mock polls held at the Ateneo de Davao University, with 170 out of 194 votes cast.

The lone Mindanawon bet who joined the Magic 12 at number 12 is Juan Miguel Zubiri with 85, or half the number of votes Escudero got.

For party-list groups, Kabataan topped the polls with 52 votes followed by Gabriela (45), Bayan Muna (34), Anak Mindanaw (7) and Abanse! Pinay (5).

Posted in the university website, the Ateneo de Davao choice of the Senate 12 is a mix between administration and opposition – five each from Team Unity and Genuine Opposition and two “Independents” (Francis Pangilinan and Manny Villar who is also included in the GO slate).

Escudero topped the senatorial race way ahead of Social Weather Stations (SWS) toprunner, Pangilinan, who received 158 votes with Villar following closely behind with 157. Villar ranked third, too, in the SWS survey.

The rest of the candidates and their votes: Joker Arroyo (146, TU); Ralph Recto (138, TU); Benigno Aquino II (132, GO); Loren Legarda (131, GO); Alan Peter Cayetano (115, GO), Edgardo Angara (108, TU), Panfilo Lacson (107, GO); Mike Defensor (98, TU); and Zubiri (TU) with 85.

Former Senator John Osmena (70, GO), Aquilino “Coco” Pimentel (55, GO) and Prospero Pichay (50, TU).

The Botong Pinoy Mock Elections was spearheaded by the Social Involvement Coordinating Office (SICO) through its director, Ma. Teresa Isidor in coordination with the SAMAHAN Central Board's (Student Council) President, Patricia Silva and its Secretary General, Denise Subido.

The mock elections made use of "touch screen" equipped computer stations located at the ground floor of Thibault Hall. The computers had pictures of senatorial and party list candidates on which the "voters" could click or select using a finger and the system printed the ballot with the list of chosen candidates.

Alfred Padlan of Mega Group of Computer Companies said the automated mock polls showed that elections using computers can work.

The Botong Pinoy Mock Elections was open from 8 a.m. to 3 p.m. and was done simultaneously in Dumaguete, La Union, Los Banos and Manila, Padlan said. The results were immediately sent to the server in Manila but the results of the mock polls in the other areas were not posted in the Ateneo de Davao website.


I only hope that he would also win in the real elections. Am I right Team Chiz?

The Cheating Checklist

Things to Do to Ensure a Midterm Elections Victory
Appoint Ronaldo Puno as secretary of the Department of Interior and Local Government.

Appoint Hermogenes Ebdane as secretary of the Department of National Defense.

Place military elements in the urban areas.

Publish photos of Joma Sison dancing with Ara Mina in the papers.

Raid houses of nominees of left-leaning party lists.

Burn the COMELEC?

Appoint Virgilio Garciliano...anywhere...anytime.

Philhealth cards. School feeding program...etcetera.

Tweak survey results as election nears.

In the end...it shall be noted.


Things to Do to Ensure Charter Change
Ensure the victory of Dato Arroyo.

Ensure the victory of Manny Pacquiao.

Ensure the victory of Ronaldo Puno! Mr Speaker...

Ensure the victory of Jose De Venecia? Hmmm...

Survey Says

The survey was conducted from February 24 to February 27 comparing it to the November 2006 results, here's how the candidates gained or lost ground.

1st Francis Pangilinan (GAIN: from 3rd to 1st)
2nd Loren Legarda (LOST: from 1st to 2nd)
3rd Manny Villar (GAIN: from 7th to 3rd)
4th Allan Peter Cayetano (GAIN: from tied for 5th to tied for 4th)
5th Panfilo Lacson (LOST: from 2nd to tied for 4th)
6th Francis Escudero (GAIN: from 10th to tied for 6th)
7th Ralph Recto (LOST: from tied for 5th to tied for 6th)
8th Vicente Sotto III (LOST: from 4th to 8th)
9th John Osmena (GAIN: from tied for 12th to tied for 9th)
10th Benigno Aquino III (GAIN: from tied for 12th to tied for 9th)
11th Gregorio Honasan (LOST: from tied for 8th to 11th)
12th Joker Arroyo (GAIN: from tied for 12th to solo 12th)

The following candidates also lost ground:
Aquilino Pimentel III (LOST: from tied for 8th to 11th)
Edgardo Angara (LOST: from 11th to 13th)
Prospero Pichat (LOST: from 18th to 22nd)

Mike Defensor is still stuck in the 15th place.

According to Dr Mahar Mahangas:
There is a possibility for a 10-2 outcome due to a slight gain by the opposition or an 8-4 outcome if the administration catches up.

According to The Purple Phoenix:
Despite the unraveling of the Genuine Opposition, most of their candidates figured in the top 12 of the latest SWS survey. If this does not show how most Filipinos hate the current administration then I don't know what.

Despite being dropped by the Genuine Opposition, Sharon Cuneta is still a popular figure.

Despite of his movie star statuses, Richard Gomez and Cesar Montano's ranking is still in the twilight zone.

Despite of the numerous Walking 'Tol and Itanim sa Senado posters around the metro, Defensor and Pichay still ranks below the winner circle.

Despite the sacrifices of Boy Abunda, Mike Defensor is still out of the top 12.

Despite being an independent, Gringo is still part of the Magic 12.

Despite of the money spent on his ads, Boom Tarat Tarat is not helping Juan Miguel Zubiri.

By the way, if you are looking for Chavit Singson...he's ranked above Cayetano...Jose Pepito Cayetano. This is not a joke. It's true.

The Letter of Harvey Keh

I finally received the email. But must I receive several of it? Nah. Seriously. Thank you to all the people who forwarded the message.

The message:
Dear Fellow Filipino,

Good day to all of you! Before I begin my letter... just a disclaimer, for people who know me they know that I love the Philippines very much and I am not really one who rants and complaints to high heavens about what is happening to our country and does nothing about it, in fact, I feel that at my relatively young age of 27, I have done much service to the Philippines by setting up Pathways to Higher Education which has sent more than 500 poor but deserving students to college and AHON Foundation which has already built two public elementary school libraries that have benefitted more than 3,500 students. Yet, after seeing how events in our nation have transpired the past few weeks and talking with some friends, I feel the urge to share with you my own thoughts and feelings.

Over the weekend, we saw the completion of two major political alliances for this coming Senate Elections that has just began here in the Philippines . Now we have two political forces with familiar faces nonetheless on opposite sides of the fences. On one end, you have Tito Sotto and Tessie Aquino-Oreta who were two major stalwarts of the opposition and the FPJ Campaign in 2004 hobnobbing with the woman (Pres. GMA) whom they claimed to have cheated FPJ in the last Presidential Elections.On the other side of the fence, you see Manny Villar, the former house speaker who was actually responsible for impeaching Erap now part of the United Opposition who is led by no less than... Erap himself. Now if you don't see anything wrong with this picture then you must be one of the many Filipinos who have accepted this very sad reality that there is indeed no permanent ideals that our government leaders stand up for but rather they just go where there self-interests can best be served. It is this kind of politics why I no longer wonder why good people like Ramon Magsaysay Awardee Mayor Jesse Robredo of Naga City or outstanding Bulacan Governor Josie Dela Cruz will find it hard or worse, never be elected to national positions.

It is with these in mind that I'd like to share with you what are events this coming May elections that will make me consider leaving the Philippines :

1.) If former COMELEC Commissioner Virgilio Garcillano of Hello Garci fame wins in his bid to become Congressman of Bukidnon...seeking to replace a good man no less in incumbent Cong. Neric Acosta... We would really be the laughing stock of the whole world if we allow a man with the reputation of Garci to be one of our so called "Honorable Gentlemen".

2.) If Dancing Queen Tessie Aquino Oreta reclaims her seat at the Senate... I hope that all of us would still remember that dance that she did during the 2001 impeachment hearings after they voted to overrule the decision of then Chief Justice Davide... let us make sure that people like her never make it to the Senate again.

3.) If Richard Gomez becomes a senator... what does he know about making laws? We already have the likes of Bong Revilla and Lito Lapid in the Senate and their performance or lack of it would be reason enough not to elect another actor who has no prior experience in government to the distinguished halls of the Senate.

4.) If Gringo Honasan wins again.... have we not learned our lesson? I cannot believe that just because someone is charismatic then we will just elect him to become one of our senators despite the fact that he has time and again caused so much instability in our country... if we want a military junta similar to that of Thailand ... then lets all vote for this guy....

5.) If Manny Pacquiao becomes Congressman of General Santos City... everybody loves Manny the Boxing Champ but Manny the Lawmaker? Lets be realistic here, Manny is our Hero alright but I think it takes more than just great boxing skills and a desire to serve to be able to make appropriate laws that would help uplift the lives of the many Filipinos who live in Poverty.

6.) If Lito Lapid wins for Mayor of Makati City... I don't like Jojo Binay as well but Lito Lapid as city mayor of the country's finance and business center?!?! And do you really think he is from Makati and has good plans for the city? The Arroyos asking someone like him to run just goes to show you how much love and concern this government has for our country.

7.) If Chavit Singson becomes a Senator, Illegal Gambling = Chavit... enough said.

Now if all of these 7 things happen during this coming elections then don't be surprised if I decide to leave this country that I love dearly. Like I said during the first part of my letter, I feel that I have done much for this country but I think its time that Filipinos become more vigilant and critical in selecting our leaders for the sake of our future and the generations that will go beyond us. So I appeal to every Filipino who asks what can I actually do for my country... Choose and vote for the right people this coming elections, huwag na tayong magpaloko sa mga kandidatong maganda lang ang jingle o gwapo lang sa mga poster. Let us choose leaders who have a good track record for service and who are genuinely committed towards serving our country.

Manindigan naman tayong lahat para sa ating Kinabukasan at para sa Kapakanan ng ating Bayan!

Thank you very much for your time in reading this letter.

Sincerely,

Harvey S. Keh

Animosity of an Anonymous Reader

This is not the first time I received an unfavorable comment. I'm sure of it because I still remember the name of the reader. He was gentleman enough to identify his name. He even has a picture.

I don't edit any comments in my blog. But wouldn't it be great if I know who makes these reactions so that I could make a better reply. There were two messages from an 'anonymous' reader that accused me of being an Erap supporter. He even made commments against Francis Escudero in another. I know that he or she is just one and the same because it's reflected in the the time of posting.

Here's one of his post:
bayaran ka kamo ng mga kampon ni erap!!! kabit ka siguro ng papa erap mo!!! puro ka kabalbalan!!

Here's my reply:
Anonymous,

I would like to thank you for visiting my blog and reading my entries. However, I would like to tell you that I was part of EDSA Dos. If you still remember your history, it was the pseudo-revolution that kicked Erap out of position.

Second, my father is aligned with the administration. Yet he gives me freedom in choosing the candidates who I think should be elected. The last time I check, the Philippines is a democratic country.

Third, just a point of clarification, I am not a mistress of Estrada. I do not even have a boyfriend until now. Why? I don't need one.

Lastly, if you are really brave as your comments could you please identify yourself. I'm proud of what I'm saying that's why even put my picture in my blog. Are you proud of what you're saying? If yes, tell me your identity.

Sincerely,
Jowana Balana Bueser

PS
See. I could even right my full name with all dignity.

My name is Jowana Balana Bueser, a Filipina and a registered voter - in the coming elections I shall use my right to elect deserving candidates. The undeserving ones shall reap eternal condemnation. For now, I'll give them hell.

Warning: Danger in the Midst

I have finally completed my personal blacklist of candidates that should not win in the upcoming midterm elections.

Mike Defensor
Days from now, I will be posting pictures of tree killers - candidates whose paraphernalia desecrate the beauty and dignity of trees in the metro. There are only a few healthy trees left in Metro Manila and these candidates have the arrogance of placing their non-biodegradable campaign materials in tree trunks? Ironically, the former Department of Environment and Natural Resources secretary tops the list. Sure he could always say that he does not know about it and that it was the work of his uninformed supporters. But he's tree-killing paraphernalia are spread out in Quezon City, his family's supposed bailiwick.


Francis Pangilinan
Mr Sharon Cuneta is the second worst tree-killer in Quezon City. Maybe this is his way of exacting revenge to the city that DID NOT VOTE for him. Candidates who utilizes the star power of their wives should not be elected. If that is the case then they should let their wives run instead.

Ralph Recto
One word: taxes.

Miguel Zubiri
His photoshopped campaign pictures makes you want to run blind-folded in the QC Circle. But this avowed environmentalist is another tree killer. Apart from that,he should better explain how his family would benefit from bio-fuel diesel. This type of energy harnesses corn and SUGAR - right? Sugar.

Edgardo Angara
This candidate is dangerous to your presidency. Right Erap? Right FPJ?

Joker Arroyo
What the hell happened to you?

Manny Villar
He is espousing industriousness and patience in order to succeed in life. He should add a third one: marry somebody from a rich and influential family.

Tito Sotto
Even if he did not defect to the dark side, I still would not vote for him. Why? He is Tito Sotto.

Tessie Oreta
She promises free pre-schooling. Even if that is the only that she would do in the senate - then my goodness - she's an utter waste of pork barrel. Pre-school only? Why not complete formal education?

Prospero Pichay
The word 'arrogance' was invented for him. His bulge is enough evidence how voracious his appetite is and would be if elected to the upper chamber.

Luis Singson
Duh!

Cesar Montano
Whatever got into the head of this guy? You have a beautiful wife. Two beautiful childeren. A flourishing path to acting greatness and you opted to plunged head-first to a concrete wall of embarrassment by running in the senatorial elections? For a decisive actor, you're one lousy decision-maker.

John Osmena
I'm from the University of the Philippines. I don't forget my history. I don't forget our history.

Nikki Coseteng
She must have forgotten something that is why she is running again. What could that be?

You might be looking for names like Vic Magsaysay and Jamalul Kiram. Congratulations! Your memory is in good condition. You did remember their names.Wow.

Sinners and Saints

I have not receive the email of Harvey Keh - the 27-year old guy who vowed to leave the country if certain politicians win in the upcoming elections. One of those that could prompt this young leader is a win by Gloria Arroyo's favorite witness Chavit Singson.

The Ilocano warlord cried that it was unfair for Keh to equate him with gambling. I personally do not know Singson but I guess it would be ignorant of the public to equate him with pink floral pillows. Further, the administration candidate said that the other politicians are not saints, thus it's unfair to single out a select few.

That made me laugh. There are no saints in the current list of senatoriables but - damn - we know which should be elected. Apparently, Keh and I are on the same page. There's no need for us to know you more Mr Singson (that's his advice to Keh), your public notoriety is enough for us.

My father always tells me that even the pope can get corrupted by the political system in our country. Apparently, my father forgot his church history since there was a time when popes were the embodiment of human corruptibility. But I believe my father. There are a lot of good men and women who were swallowed by the rusty and lethal iron cage of Philippine politics. But there are still a number of them who resist its deadly charms.

Thus it is the responsibility of every one to vote and campaign for people who resists the iron cage. Singson is not one of them. I guess the reason why Keh included him in his list is that he knows Singson is one of those who strengthens the hold of the fatal cage.

Be Kind to Animals

By now, you have probably heard the campaign jingle against the Three Progenies of Mephistopheles: Edgardo Angara, Tito Sotto, and Tessie Oreta. Entitled ASO (based on their surname initials)and inspired by the old pop song 'How Much is that Dog in the Window, the pro-Erap and pro-FPJ has officially launched their war against modern-day traitors.

I am all for any campaign that would derail the chances of these turncoats...but why give dogs a bad name. I suggest that they put periods after each letter: A.S.O.

Dogs are the latest animals who have been victimized by politics.


Crocodiles
These reptiles are the classic metaphors for congressmen. Our prehistoric friend does not have a voracious appetite. They spend more time sleeping than eating. On the other hand, lazy congressmen spend their time sleeping AND eating. There's a huge difference.


Pig
I'll give you a thunderous right hook if you dare call Mike Arroyo a pig. Pigs are cute and useful. Mike...I'm not prepared for a libel case.


Snake
Snakes are smart animals. More importantly, they need to be smart. If you don't have legs, what else could you do but be smart? The thing is snakes need to outsmart larger predators since it's the rule of the survival of the fittest. Politicians try to outsmart others because they're power hungry. Snakes do not bite all the time; bad politicians do.


Tokay Gecko
If you regularly watch Kim Atienza's TV Patrol segment, then you know that this is the English name of 'tuko.' How many position-hungry politicians have been described as a 'tuko.' This gecko specie was made that way - having suction in its feet so that it could climb. Corrupt politicians were not; they just love to suck.



Insects
Did you know that insects are the most populous in the animal kingdom? If you keep on slandering the legacy of their thoraxes, I would not be surprised if they one take over the world. I just hope they start eating the bad eggs in politics.

P.S.
I just saw a grasshopper. It's quite big. I'm teaching it how to go to Malacanang... just in case it gigantically mutates one day.

Finally. The decision that I have been waiting for these past few days has come. The Grand Opposition has decided to replace Mr Sharon Cuneta either with Zosimo Paredes (Pick him.)or Gringo Honasan (Let me think about it.) or Richard Gomez (No way.). After given an ultimatum, the loyalty-challenged Mr Noted decided not to join the opposition's proclamation rally this coming Saturday.

He added that he was never part of the Grand Opposition since he is running as an independent candidate. Mr Sharon Cuneta declared that it is not dignified that he be forced to join (the proclamation rally) or be punished for not attending it. What the... Can you actually believe that he has the guts to talk about 'dignity.'

Mr Sharon Cuneta is afraid that the FPJ supporters would not acknowledge his candidacy in the upcoming proclamation rally. I'm not a fan of Rez Cortez but I loved his 'No to Mr Noted' battlecry.

There are a lot of reasons why we should not vote for Mr Sharon Cuneta. Here are some of the most obvious:
1. His loyalty is ambiguous.
2. He has no principles. You do not call for the resignation of a person after you partook in her Grand Deception - knowingly or unknowingly.
3. Do I have to say it again? Mr Sharon Cuneta. It's quite obvious that he won because of the Megastar. If not, why does he have to be part of her concerts as well as her instant noodle endorsements?

I'm not the only person who can see how Mr Sharon Cuneta is maximizing the star power of his wife. Thus it is our duty to enlighten those who are still blinded by the mega light.

Open up your eyes. It is blinding enough to make you forget that his name is Ki... Mr Sharon Cuneta.

Video Chronology of the Senate Candidacy of Chiz

The Filing of the Candidacy
The day before he filed his candidacy, the Jose De Venecia was quoted in a newspaper interview that the lawmaker from Sorsogon might join Team Unity. On the 30th of January, Escudero filed his candidacy to quell the nasty rumors.

Named as One of the UNO Candidates
Congressman Escudero made it to the first installment of senate slate announcement of the United Opposition.


Presentation of Opposition's Complete Line-up
He's not in the video but his father was.


Start of the Campaign
Chiz launches campaign via Internet chat.

On the Campaign Trail
It's really a no-brainer why this guy gets mobbed by people. Can you spell G-O-R-G-E-O-U-S?

Meeting with Estrada
With the opposition's most important endorser - apart from the Filipinos.