1. Government employees will be required to wear 'baston' pants and cowboy hats as their official uniform.
2. Bars and other nightspots in the city will be replaced with stores of Pampanga's Best tocino.
3. All Makati residents will be required to watch Mark Lapid movies. It's not free...they have to pay so -at least- it will earn some money.
4. Ayala Avenue will be pronounced as Hayala Havenue.
5. Police cars will be replaced with horses. Environment-friendly na, pormang Leon Guerrero pa!
6. Opposition rallies will be prohibited and will be replaced with weekily Lito Lapid Fans Day.
7. The English language will be strictly prohibited in all areas of the city.
8. The Makati Business Club (MBC) will be ignored in favor of the MJBC of Makati Business Jueteng Club.
9. A bronze statue of Gloria Macapagal Arroyo will be placed beside the Ninoy Aquino statue. It will have an inscription that says, "The Filipino is worth LYING for."
10. The gap between the rich and the poor will be totally eradicated in Makati. The poor remains poor though but all the rich businessmen decided to migrates elsewhere FOR GOOD after Lapid won the post. O di ba, dominant class na ang mga pobre!
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